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Tour Report 2019

By Mark Newson

by Mark Newson

Tour started in the usual fashion. Costumes were inspected, fines were imposed and drinks where consumed. We had our team photo and boarded the coach. We hadn’t even crossed the Essex border before 2 of the virgins had a sudden bout of travel sickness.

Due to said sickness we pulled into the nearest services where some of the tourists had the pleasure of a very expensive toilet break courtesy of Thurrock County Council.

Later we had an actual scheduled services stop, where we had a Burger King and for the 2nd year in a row some “complimentary” doughnuts (this is becoming a bit of a tour tradition)

We arrived at the luxury hostel (which included 3 tier bunk beds) dumped our bags and headed out to see what the City of Bristol had to offer. We found some local taverns where Sir Power led the traditional games with Dan Wren probably ending up with the most spots!

After a quick romantic pizza, and after myself and Russ Yellop had put Rawlinson the Younger to bed, a few of us headed deeper into the town and sampled the local delicacies, Bristol Gin and local Cider. Much to the displeasure of my stomach the next day!

During the evening some of the other tour party had a fun mixing with the locals I am led to believe.

The next morning we headed to the local Whethersoons for breakfast where we were waited on by the Virgins (who were each allowed a kids meal and fruit shoot for their troubles)

After this our coach driver took us on a quick sightseeing tour taking in the SS Great Britain and Clifton Suspension bridge before arriving at our hosts for the day Cotham Park RFC.

After a few isotonic cloudy ciders we kicked off. The tourists started well despite several attempts by the hosts to “Build a wall”. Jordan Darkwa, Will Evans and Jake Yellop adding scores. Eventually however hangovers kicked in and the hosts dominated the game. Final Score Dagenham XV 20, Cotham XV more points.

Afterwards Tour Captain Kitenge presented the hosts with a club plaque and shirt before King Brian commenced court where various liquid fines were imposed (mainly to the virgins)

Back on the coach we headed back to the city centre for a few more beverages before a few of us then went for some culinary delights at the local curry house.

Whilst some of the younger tourists went for some dancing and romancing I went back to the hostel for a well earned rest.

Sunday morning saw another Wetherspoon breakfast before heading home with a takeaway breakfast for an absent Chris Warner. Alas tour was over for another year!

Thanks to everyone that helped to organise and to Cotham Park for being great hosts.

Tourists 2019
R. Yellop, J. Yellop, Goodenough, Tank, Smith, Meggs, Power, Hogwood, B. Wren, G. Wren, D. Wren, Riley, Garwood, P. Warner, C. Warner, J. Warner, Evans, Newson, Darkwa the Older, Darkwa the younger, C. Rawlinson the Older, C. Rawlinson the Younger, Fergie, Kenny, Kitenge, Eggy

More photos can be found here

Updated 12:12 - 8 May 2019 by Mark Newson

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